Burning

I've made plans to visit someone. I've made plans in my head for the way things are going to go. I've run the scenario over in my mind and laughed at myself. Here I am attempting to run simulations of my own life. I've been nervous. I'm not entirely positive where the nerves have started. I can tell they exist and that's about the extent of it.

I've been burning to see her. I've been burning to be intoxicated by her. I've been burning to exist in close proximity to her. Soon i'll have the chance and I'm very excited. I spoke with her today, for a few moments, and my smile almost split my face in two.

I'm dancing on the head of a pin from day to day. I'm burning the candle at both ends to survive. I'm burning myself out. I can feel the motivation slip sometimes and I have to be careful. I can see things letting up and I know that's what I'll need. In the meantime, i'll dance and dance and burn a little more.

Then she was glowing. I was trying to finish a sentence. It fell apart in my head, even though my mouth managed to get it out correctly. I was standing straight up and falling at the same time. I was a mess and perfectly fine. It was intense. This is intense.

This is living and breathing and finding myself. This is Destiny reminding me of the promise I made. The promise that burns continually in the back of my mind.

I'm beginning a journey with no end in sight. I just hope they have maps along the way.